General Travel

Morocco: the “essay”

/ kw1385 / 2 Comments

Note: I’m trying my hand at more “sophisticated” travel writing, so this piece does not provide the play-by-play or pictures typical of my other posts. 

“You’re going to Morocco… and Turkey?”

Yes, I know those aren’t exactly next to each other; that was never the point. I’ve just started a new decade of my life, so I wanted to aim for places that were entirely different from any I have previously visited. Morocco and Turkey may be on separate continents, but they have one core feature in common: both are predominantly Muslim countries. That wasn’t why I chose them – I had heard a lot about both – but it ended up being the unifying theme of the trip and the thing that most stands out to me about my experience in Morocco particularly.

I used to be pretty passionate about international relations, so I’m not totally without exposure to Islam, but the 10 days my friend Mary and I spent in these two Muslim countries showed us a very humbling amount of things we did not know. From the moment I first heard the call to prayer in Morocco, I had a steady flow of questions about the practices that are a core part of life in these societies, for example about the call to prayer (why five times a day? why at those specific times? how does one qualify to be a muezzin calling everyone to prayer? do they choose from a hymnal-type selection of pieces to sing/call? does the same person do all five calls to prayer each day?) and wearing headscarves (what does the Koran say about this? how tight do they need to be? when do women start wearing them, since almost almost all the young girls had their hair freely exposed?).

Morocco looks and feels more Muslim than the one part of Turkey I saw (Istanbul), and that penetration varied within Morocco as well. Marrakesh was undoubtedly the most Muslim-feeling destination of the whole trip. We saw almost no Moroccan women there with uncovered heads, and we saw significantly more women there than in other places wearing additional coverage, usually just in the form of long sleeves on the arms, but there were also a significant number of women wearing the full veils so that only their eyes were visible. Mary and I, being travelers who care deeply about blending in and showing respect for local culture, had of course packed more conservative clothing in order to be more covered throughout the trip: we spent the entire time wearing long maxi dresses with shrugs, sweaters, or scarves around our shoulders. We also brought scarves that we could wear on our heads, and Marrakesh made us feel this was necessary – not because anyone seemed to care that we hadn’t covered our heads, but because, to the extent it was not already obvious, walking around with uncovered heads was the equivalent of wearing a neon sign saying “I am a tourist!” We had not realized that most women also covered their arms and often their feet, so even after we started wearing the hijab we still had a bit of a give-away in the form of our short sleeves and sandals.

I can only think of one other country I’ve visited where I really wanted to blend in for reasons of security as much as respect, and that was Venezuela. (I went in 2010, two weeks before the New York Times published an article indicating that Caracas – where I had been – was more deadly than Baghdad. I was in no rush to call attention to the fact that I was foreign, let alone American, and the fact that we never encountered a single other foreign tourist should tell you a lot.) The past few days since my return from this trip have been a little funny because so many people have said “yeah, I would have advised you not to go to Morocco with another woman.” I have no idea why we were so unprepared for the challenge of traveling as two (smart, independent, street-savvy) women in Morocco. British people fly down to Morocco all the time for long weekends (we saw plenty of them), and given that the British are just as bad as the stereotypical Americans abroad (I saw plenty of women with tons of exposed skin), I had just taken this to mean that we would be totally fine. Why would so many people visit a place that was uncomfortable or dangerous?

Most of what made our time in Morocco, and particularly in Marrakesh, more challenging was not actually overt danger, though a man did follow us down the alley to our riad one night before turning around when we reached the door, and I don’t think I’ve ever clutched my purse so tightly to my body while walking around. What grated on our nerves, and made us very thankful indeed for the freedoms we enjoy, were the subtleties of navigating daily life as women. We came to feel, and again this is mostly in Marrakesh, that someone was almost always taking advantage of us in some way because we were women. I find it difficult to write about this in a balanced, diplomatic way because I remain unsure about to what extent what we experienced was typical and whether it was more to do with what would happen to any foreigners in Morocco or whether there was in fact some exacerbation of the existing practice (or we were less able to deal with the existing practice) because we were women. There are many countries around the world where, for example, you have to bargain for purchases in order not to be totally ripped off; I’m talking about something more subtle. I think we were shouted at by street vendors more than the men, but that’s not a big deal. More to my point is this example: our riad hired a tour guide to lead us around the medina during the first half of our one full day in Marrakesh. While I loved Abdullah in certain respects – he was very open, provided a lot of great one-liners that I wrote down, and answered every question we asked – we ended up paying him a not insubstantial amount of money for a tour that ultimately did not show us any of the “must-sees” in Marrakesh and instead included quite a bit of what I will call “performance shopping”. We spent half an hour in a carpet shop, where the owner and his assistants gave us tea and laid out at least 30 rugs for us to admire, touch, and evaluate for potential purchase. I’m not saying I did not appreciate the opportunity to see these rugs; they were undoubtedly beautiful, and I might well have bought one if I had a space big enough, but we had not asked for this, and it felt wrong having to pay him for time that was not in fact spent guiding us (he wasn’t even in the room). We stopped at a few other shops as well, and though we did buy some products at a women’s cooperative selling argan oil and other Moroccan beauty products, on the whole this was not something we had anticipated or desired when we arranged the tour. We found it difficult to be assertive because we did not want to be rude to Abdullah or to any of these other people (who, even if it was only because they were hoping to make money, were all very welcoming and polite) – is that reluctance to offend perhaps more typical of women than men? You see why I find it difficult to assess whether our experience was common to everyone or whether it was exacerbated by our gender. And back at our riad that afternoon, the taxi booked to take us to and from our hammam cost much more than the ride the riad had also arranged from the airport, which is significantly further away. We began to wonder if the young man who was managing the riad in the absence of the owner was getting some sort of kickback, and his by then overly familiar attitude with us – which culminated in him being more touchy-feely than appropriate when helping me put on my hijab – started to make us distinctly uncomfortable and glad that we were leaving Marrakesh early the following morning.

Now, don’t get me wrong – Marrakesh is a beautiful and fascinating place, and one to which I’d return in the company of a man. We had a much more comfortable experience in Rabat, which is both more progressive and more polished as a result of being the capital (and one that doesn’t happen to be a major tourist destination). Whereas 99% of the women in Marrakesh had covered their heads, in Rabat I’d estimate that this was more like 50-60%, though there still wasn’t a single woman on the beach wearing anything less than a full set of clothes. Mary and I stayed covered elsewhere but dispensed with the hijab, which in that setting would have almost seemed like too much effort on our part. Rabat also holds the distinction of being the only place on the trip where we managed to have all our dinners uninterrupted by unwanted and uninvited attention from our male waiters. And there aren’t nearly as many tourists in Rabat; I think it reflects very well on a city when tourists are treated more or less like locals. The vendors in the medina did not call out to us or otherwise try to trap us in their stalls; they were content to greet us if we showed interest, to answer questions that we had, and then to let us be on our way. On the whole, we felt much more at ease in Rabat, which is part of the reason we decided to stay there an extra day rather than seeing Fez, which we expected to be a repeat of Marrakesh and thus just not worth the trouble.

So to tie everything together: Morocco was my first foray into the Muslim world. I remain fascinated (and inspired) by much of what I saw and experienced in that context and plan to acquire some reading materials so that I am significantly better informed about Islam. That being said, the biggest questions I have stem from the tangled web of cause and effect relating to the religion and to the status of women. I hope that I can avoid relying on stereotypes as I write this as that is not at all my intention; however, I think it is fair to say that one thing most people associate with the Muslim world is the secondary status of women, at least by Western standards. I was privileged to grow up in a country where, in most essential ways, women are equal to men in theory if not yet in practice, and I personally have never been denied any opportunity or in any way restricted because of my gender, so naturally I believe that this is how it should be elsewhere. That’s not to say that men do not routinely take advantage of women, in various ways, in the US and elsewhere – far from it – but in my experience that feels more like the exception to the rule than it did in Morocco. I have a lot more reading to do before I can offer any educated remarks on the extent to which the teachings of Islam have shaped the role of women in Morocco. All I can offer based on my observations over five days (and I am happy to receive comments on this), is that I do think there is a link between the extent to which women are protected (I am choosing to see it that way rather than something more intentionally prejudicial) and the effect this has on how they are perceived and treated by men. I remain very interested in visiting other Muslim countries, but I think this is the last time I will do so without a man accompanying me. This trip was humbling not only for its reminders of how little we knew about Islam but also for the limitations it has shown us as seasoned travelers. I would not have described myself as conceited, but I did used to think that I was a pretty savvy traveler, that there was not a place or situation (within the bounds of common sense and reason) that I could not adapt myself to or enjoy as a female traveler, at least not if I had another person with me. This is the first time I’ve really come up against something that made me reconsider that assessment and admit some form of defeat. Could I go back to Morocco as a solo woman? No, not even if I pretended to be married. Could I go back to Morocco with another woman? Yes, but the stresses of doing so would likely outweigh the benefits (though I would like to think that knowing what to expect would be half the battle).

All in all, I can’t say I was in any way sorry to leave Morocco. I do hope I will go back another time, with a man, to see the things I missed in Marrakesh and to see Fez. Morocco is a large and richly diverse country with a lot to offer visitors, and in that sense we only scratched the surface. Next time, I’ll be more prepared and hopefully better poised to continue these observations in a more sheltered way.

The Art of Travel

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I finally find myself in the position of being an American who lives abroad and can now observe my fellow American travelers more from the perspective of the locals. I’ve always aimed to be a model ambassador of America, and because I’ve traveled to South America, Europe, and Asia, I’ve had a lot of opportunities to practice the art of travel in different situations. Here are my suggestions for being an expert traveler.

  1. Do your research and plan ahead.

I’m not saying you have to plot out an hour-by-hour agenda for your trip (you shouldn’t), but you should read up on your forthcoming destination(s) and have a good idea of what you want to see, do, and eat while there. (Yes, eat – food is absolutely one of my motivations for traveling, and in my opinion if you’re not trying the local cuisine then there’s just no point in being there at all.) This is important even if you are visiting or staying with someone who lives in that place – it puts a lot of pressure on the host to have to come up with everything, and it’s much better for you as the traveler if you have your own ideas of what seems most interesting! Ideally, your pre-travel research should extend beyond guidebooks; for instance, if you’re going to Paris, watch a few movies set in Paris, and read some of the many memoirs written by Americans or other expats in Paris. Their perspectives on the culture, and inclusion of all sorts of random details about everyday life, will both enrich your own observations and help to minimize the number of surprises you encounter when you arrive. They can also help you to conform with important standards of politeness, such as knowing that in Paris you greet the owners of shops when you enter.

  1. Pack light, but with useful accessories.

You shouldn’t travel without an umbrella, period, unless you’re going to the desert. There are a few other items that I always bring, because you never know when they’ll come in handy:

  • earplugs (there is always street noise, even in a five-star hotel)
  • eye mask (I can sleep under a bright light, but if you’re sensitive to light, this is invaluable)
  • a small sleep sack or even a sleeping bag (my sleep sack folds up into a pouch that’s about 3×5”; my sleeping bag is also very compact and makes a great pillow when in its sack. It has served me well during two nights camping out at London’s Heathrow airport.)
  • travel towels (again, compact, and always useful – I like to have one in my carry-on so I can wash my face before and after long flights)
  • corkscrew (I have one of those combos that also has a little knife; great for wine and cheese picnics in Paris)
  • fold-up water bottle (I have one by Vapur that is completely flat when empty)
  • combination lock (this is a must if you’re staying in a hostel)
  • a Sharpie (you’d be surprised how often it can be helpful to have a permanent marker)
  • eye drops (great for long overnight flights to help you instantly feel less tired upon arrival)
  1. Leave your native expectations and habits behind.

Travel is about broadening your perspectives and experiences. This means eating the local food, attempting to speak the local language, and generally engaging with locals as much as possible. If you’re on a long trip and are dying for a taste of home one night, fine, but don’t be that person who orders only familiar food at the expense of trying new (and likely incredible) things.

It is also important to be aware of differences in culture so that you are better about blending in. For example, Americans are almost always the loudest people in the room when they’re outside the United States. You don’t realize how loudly we talk until you are suddenly sitting with French people next to a table of Americans and realize that you can hear every single word of their conversation because the French all speak relatively softly in comparison. Small linguistic differences can be useful to know, too: saying “pants” in the UK means something very different from “trousers.”

Other things that are likely to surprise less-traveled Americans:

  • Hotel rooms and bathrooms are TINY in comparison to the ones in any standard American hotel. This is because, particularly in Europe, each square foot of real estate is much more expensive, and thus space is at a premium. Don’t expect a full bathtub, and know that a double occupancy room is likely to have two twin beds pushed together rather than a double or queen-sized bed.
  • Some Europeans tend to be less dependent on shower curtains (in my experience, Spain, Italy, and France). In such cases, the shower head most likely detaches from the wall, and with some care you should be able to avoid getting water all over the room. Think of it as a fun challenge!
  • In many countries, you can’t flush paper or anything else down the toilet. You’ve just got to get over that. In some places, you may not even have an actual toilet. Again, try to see it as a fun challenge (and take a deep breath of fresh air before you go in).
  • Standards of service vary from country to country. Accepting that fact is essential for the benefit of all concerned. You can’t get angry at your Parisian waiter for not coming to check on you every five minutes; that’s just now how it’s done in Paris, and lack of attention does not mean that you have a bad waiter.
  • Waiting in line can be a verrrrrrry different experience in some countries. You may encounter lines that are are more wide than they are long or where people are constantly cutting or where everyone is yelling or where there is only one person dealing with the line despite its absolutely massive length. This is why it is essential to pack your patience (and maybe a flask).

It’s easy to become anxious in countries that are less developed, where for instance you can’t drink the water. Act cautiously (I’m paranoid about digestive illnesses when I travel) but don’t let this become the entire focus of your trip.

  1. Choose Your Travel Companions Carefully

I’ve been extraordinarily fortunate in the people with whom I’ve done all of my big trips, and that’s largely down to luck because I’ve never actually evaluated potential travel partners or thought “so-and-so would be really great to see _____ with; I should see if she’s interested!” My trips have come together pretty organically. Nearly all of my international travel before the end of college was with school groups (three weeks in Italy during high school, summer in Spain during college, various Model UN trips), so not only did I have friends with me; I had a lot of friends with me. In big groups, the dynamics aren’t so important – if you don’t jive with someone, you don’t have to spend time with them. Where your companions really matter is when there’s a smaller group or just the two of you – anytime that you’re expected to spend the majority of your time exclusively with those people.

I don’t think there’s a particular rule to follow when considering whether to travel with someone. My trips to Venezuela, Colombia, Panama, and Romania were with a male friend of mine who is in many ways my polar opposite, and all were awesome. In such situations, it’s important to be aware before the trip of any potential sources of conflict. (I am not averse to taking risks while traveling, but I am nowhere near adopting Greg’s mantra of “live by 30 or die trying.” I adjusted the boundaries of my comfort zone, and he exercised a little more caution. Compromise is key.) Personality is a major factor, but other things matter too. Know how much money you’re willing/able to spend during the trip and how that compares to your companions. Do you like the same kind of food? How willing are you to try local cuisine? (It’s a bummer to arrive somewhere and learn that your companion has no interest whatsoever in eating like a local.) How much physical activity are you up for? (Will you want to rely on public transportation, or are you willing to walk everywhere?) Are you more interested in working from a checklist of tourist activities or just wandering around? Are you an active tourist, or are you more interested in just relaxing? Do you need some alone time every day? If you’re part of a group, are you willing to do things on your own, or do you need the reassuring presence of the others at every moment? There are no wrong answers to any of these questions, but you should know your own answers and those of your travel companion(s) before you leave, or preferably even before you book.

Having a conversation ahead of time can save some frustration during the trip. Try to get on the same page about everything so that you can manage expectations and minimize situations of diplomatic indecision. You might consider establishing a codeword for use in situations of tension. (My mom and aunt would say “bananas” to each other while in Paris if they were getting frustrated with each other.) You should not have to be someone other than who you are while you’re traveling. You should be willing to compromise, but if you think you’re going to miss out on a significant number of things because of your travel companion(s), you should rethink your trip. In all likelihood, you’ll only go to a particular place one time in your life. Make sure you can make the most of it!

Mexican Food Abroad…

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About a month ago, CNN Travel put up a list of the top 10 things that Americans miss most while abroad. I don’t remember what the other nine were, but #1 was absolutely correct: we miss Mexican food.

It’s not that Mexican food doesn’t exist elsewhere – it does. But it’s not the same.

Last summer I went to a Mexican restaurant in Kosovo of all places. It had all the usual decorations: sombreros, cacti, traditional clothing, blinking pepper lights, etc. It was playing Mexican music, and they had an impressive menu of frozen drinks. But that’s pretty much where the similarities ended. I ordered my go-to item – a beef burrito – and while what I ended up getting wasn’t bad or in any way unenjoyable, and even though it had what appeared to be the usual set of ingredients, it definitely wasn’t a real Mexican burrito. It just didn’t taste the same.

Such was also my experience in the ICTY cafeteria today where, to my surprise, they were serving beef burritos. They didn’t look exactly the same (they were very long and had cheese wrapped around the middle), but of course I had to try one and see. I also loaded up my plate with salsa and guacamole, excited for a taste of two of my favorite snacks.

Verdict: the burrito was very good, but it tasted much more like lasagna than a burrito. There was no spiciness or any kind of kick to it. The salsa tasted more like duck sauce than anything else – it was distinctly sweet and not spicy at ALL. The guacamole… well, I don’t know what it was made of, but I don’t think it contained a single avocado.

This, friends, is why when I returned from my first summer abroad in 2005, I went straight from the airport to a Mexican restaurant. Such will be the case in August when I’ve gone THREE months without Mexican food…

UPCOMING TRAVEL! Norway, Denmark, Portugal!

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Get excited folks – I’m going to be in three different countries over the next three weekends!

This weekend we have Monday off, so a group of us are going to Oslo. (It was the cheapest airfare I found out of the 15 or so cities I searched.) We are thrilled about seeing a fjord and enjoying what promises to be beautiful weather – even warmer than here in the Hague! There’s irony for you.

The following weekend (June 1-3) my Dad and I will be in Copenhagen visiting Dad’s old friend/adopted brother Carsten and his wife Karen, who I know are going to be amazing hosts.

And the weekend after that (June 8-10), I’m heading down to Portugal to meet up with two friends from World at Play! I’m meeting them in Lisbon and then traveling down to Faro/Algarve.

Summer 2012: A Preview

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I have to start by expressing my gratitude that law school is so far opening all the doors for international work and travel that I’d hoped it would. I am absolutely thrilled to have the opportunity to work in the Office of the Prosecutor at the International Criminal Tribunal for the former Yugoslavia this summer, and though I probably won’t be able to share many details of my work there on this blog, I’ll have the chance to do quite a bit of traveling through Europe during my three months in the Hague.

When deciding on travel destinations, I often struggle between a desire to add more stamps to my passport and a desire to deepen my experiences in countries I’ve already visited. I’m trying to strike a balance this summer. I drove through (and spent a night in) France and Hungary last summer but haven’t actually done anything touristy in either country, so I think this summer will include trips to Paris and Budapest. Similarly, I spent a summer in Spain but didn’t make it to Barcelona, and as a beach-lover, I feel the need to prioritize Barce as well. I’ve been to Bosnia-Herzegovina and Serbia but didn’t get a chance to see Sarajevo or Belgrade, so those two cities are going on the list too.

As far as new countries are concerned, it’s a tough call (especially considering that the list above is already pretty long). I’ll hopefully get to visit my friend Dani in Portugal, and after that it’s a toss-up between Denmark (where I have some family) and Turkey (where I know no one but have always wanted to go).

I welcome your thoughts on these and any other destinations; you can vote here to tell me where to go!

European Summer 2012 begins, appropriately, on my birthday: May 13. Check back then!